Life and Spiritual Coaching

October 7, 2008

Living with Children over 18 – what are the rules?

Filed under: Family,Life Balance — by Donna Ritter @ 3:56 pm
Tags: , , ,


Our family is going through growing pains of sorts. Both of my children are over 18 years old and are biological having lived with us all of their lives.

I believe there are certain things that family members always should have and always should do. That is love each other unconditionally, respect each other, show each other courtesy and be honest with each other. They should also ask for forgiveness when necessary. The problem is our kids have reached young adult hood which has other expectations of instant freedom that sometimes can conflict while still being dependent on their parents if we aren’t careful.

What are the rules that should still exist? This is my position:

·         Love will never die and should rule any of our relationships. We should always talk to each other with respect and share what parts of our lives we want to.

·         We all have cell phones and can be reached at anytime, so we should at least make a pact to return calls from each other as soon as possible. Cell phones are a new concept for my husband and I – but one which my kids have lived with from the start.

·         We should respect and trust each other. This means we should talk to each other with kindness and honesty. Yes, the kids are old enough to live on their own, but since they are still living with the parents, I expect them to do things with us sometimes and let us know where they are at other times.

·         We need to treat each other with common courtesy. If you were staying at a friend’s house, and used their kitchen to make yourself food, you would clean it up. If you needed to use their washer or dryer, you would make sure you took care of the clothes they had in there already and get your clothes out of their dryer and fold them and put them away in your room. We all need to follow these rules.

·         If you are going to be late coming home, you should call and let the others know so they won’t worry.


Does anyone have any similar experiences or comments?

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