you’ve never heard of a dry county.
you don’t know what a county is.
when you hear gambling is illegal in some other states and are surprised.
you know the 12 Yats of Christmas by heart.
you know what Schwegman’s is.
when you know what “LAGNIAPPE” and “LAISSEZ LE BON TEMPS ROULER” mean.
when you go away for college, and when you tell people where you’re from they automatically know you can drink more than everyone at the school put together
u tried “cajun” food somewhere else and u thought it tasted like shit
You reinforce your attic to store Mardi Gras beads.
Your sunglasses fog up when you step outside.
When you give directions you use “lakeside and riverside” not north & south.
Your ancestors are buried above the ground.
You get on a green streetcar to go to the park and a red one to the French Quarter.
You take a bite of five-alarm chili and reach for the Tabasco.
You don’t learn until high school that Mardi Gras is not a national
You push little old ladies out of the way to catch Mardi Gras beads.
Little old ladies push YOU out of the way to catch Mardi Gras beads.
You leave a parade with footprints on your hands.
You believe that purple, green, and gold look good together.
Your last name isn’t pronounced the way it’s spelled.
you get aggrevated when 1. people think mardi gras takes place in the french quarter and 2. that people think that no matter what time of the year it is if they go to the french quarter they will get a boob shot!
when you get pissed at people who pronounce it nawlins, norlens, or new or leans.
You know what a nutria is but you still pick it to represent your baseball team.
No matter where else you go in the world, you are always disappointed in the food.
Your town is low on the education chart, high on the obesity chart and you don’t care because you’re No. 1 on the party chart.
Your house payment is less than your utility bill.
You don’t show your “pretties” during Mardi Gras.
You know that Tchoupitoulas is a street and not a disease.
Your grandparents are called “Maw-Maw” and “Paw-Paw.”
Your Santa Claus rides an alligator and your favorite Saint is a football player.
You cringe every time you hear an actor with a Southern or Cajun accent in a “New Orleans-based” movie or TV show.
You have to reset your clocks after every thunderstorm.
You’re walking in the French Quarter with a plastic cup of beer.
When it starts to rain, you cover your beer instead of your head.
You eat dinner out and spend the entire meal talking about all the other good places you’ve eaten.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Louisiana.
you know what is meant by ‘K&B purple
You know what it means for food to come ‘dressed’…
you ‘ax’ for things…
you see a van taxi with spinners
you know your from new orleans if you recognize at least one person in a parade
You save newspapers, not for recycling but for tablecloths at crawfishboils
when you travel abroad you always remember to pack 2 things: bottle of tabasco and a salt shaker of tony’s in your purse
Drive-thru daquiris — it’s not drinking and driving until you put the straw in.
You drive east to get to the West Bank.
You stand on the neutral ground at parades and have no idea what a ‘median’ is.
You get annoyed when you wear a Perlis shirt and people ask you if you work at Red Lobster.
You know how to pronounce Mignon Faget.
pulling a baby out of a cake is completely normal.
you know McKenzie is both a football player and a landmark
you made one bad turn and you end up on the twin span at least once.
you know what the twin span is.
you shop at Lakeside.
you listen to people represent their ward on Q93.
you know that the Riverwalk is for tourists.
sock hops were cool in middle school (and not the 70s) AND you think its stupid when people ask you if you actually took your socks off.
someone asks you for starbucks and you give them CCs or PJs
you have waited in the ridiculously long line for Camellia Grill during lunch at least once.
The only Bush you respect is a Black man.
You refuse to believe that there is such a thing as the “Utah Jazz”.
There is a color called “Bur-GUN-dee”.
The concept of a basement never crossed your mind.
You get your car’s suspension repaired at least twice a year.
You know at least two best places for sno-balls.
You’ve seen roaches bigger than rats.
You’ve seen rats bigger than cats.
the roof of your house was at sea level, and your stuff was at the “bottom of the sea”
WHEN YOU DONT REFER ”MARDI GRAS” AS THE CARNIVAL…WHO SAYS THAT???
If someone in a Lowe’s store offers you assistance and they don’t work there, you may live in Louisiana
If you’ve worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Louisiana
If you’ve had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Louisiana.
If “Vacation” means going to Dallas for the weekend,
you may live in Louisiana.
If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Louisiana .
If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Louisiana.
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Louisiana.
If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them , you may live in Louisiana.
If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph — you’re going 80 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Louisiana
You know that there is one “Original Lee’s Hamburgers” even though they all say they are the one.
If there’s a major hurricane headed straight for you and all you’re worried about is that they changed the time of the LSU game.